Sharing is caring:
There are times when things come out of my mouth that I never expected to say to another human. These are some favorites from the last week:
“Close the door when you’re peeing in public!”
“You have to have clothes on to play with friends.”
“Don’t put toys in your vagina!”
“That’s not chocolate, it’s your poo.”
“Don’t crawl under the bathroom stall, someone else is in there!”
I don’t think I’m being unreasonable when I say I that I NEVER thought those words would leave my mouth. Seriously. But my most aggravating bit of unexpected shared wisdom was yesterday when I said the following to BIG E:
“Why don’t you have any clothes on?”
“Did you dump ALL the oatmeal on the floor?”
I can expect a little logic from a five year old. He’s old enough to realize that dumping breakfast food all over the carpet while mom is hurriedly making dinner is not a good idea. We’ve cleaned up so many messes, he should be able to expect my reaction to oatmeal bits ground into his floor.
And yet, when he had happily bounced out of his room, naked, excitedly exclaiming “I peed in the oatmeal!” he didn’t seem to consider what would come next.
Things went downhill from there. Yelling, crying, vacuuming, sweeping, time outs, silent treatment, cold dinner. Big E and his accomplice little g were lucky that Mountain Dad came home from work right then. My furious mood could’ve seen them locked in their rooms for the rest of the night.
As a parent, I’m constantly surprised by my kids. I just wish they would surprise me in less messy and embarrassing ways.